When you want to run …

Before Sam and I got married, God was gracious enough to give me signs that we were intended to be together. I say gracious because I didn’t ask for signs; I didn’t know I needed them! But later, I would be MOST grateful for the signs…and during some pivotal moments, they would be vital to our marriage.

As a single person, I thought I had relationships figured out. I had, after all, written a nationally syndicated column for several years, as well as a book, on relationships! So as a married person, I was tempted to make Sam more responsible than I was for those moments when I wanted to run.

But relationships are always two-sided. I knew that too well to fool myself! We get stuck (maybe in serial running) when we try to assign blame! We get unstuck when we assume responsibility and grow.

Today I am happier than I could have imagined being. And I couldn’t feel this way without those pivotal moments early on, because those are the moments that spurred the most growth.

When I felt the most challenged, I had the most to learn. When I felt the most pain, I was–my issues were–the most exposed.

The growth continues. And we can revel in it, with a deep understanding and appreciation for each other and the process.