Stop … to be present and reconnect

My husband, Sam, and I have a tradition of kissing after we sit down to dinner, and before we begin eating. This is big for both of us … Sam because he likes to dive right into the food, and I because I have a thing about eating while it’s hot (guess I like to dive right in, too).

Anyway, we kiss first. And we continue kissing until we’re both present. It’s easy to get into a rut and kiss — or say I love you — without meaning it. We have to be present in order to feel the connection, rather than merely go through the motions.

Everyday busyness tempts us to think about what comes next, what has to be done before lunch or bedtime. Our egos are easily lured by meeting expectations and rehearsing the times we fell short, which can leave us living in the past and the future, rather than the present.

We can only truly live in this moment, though, and only if we’re present for it. And we can only truly live with a sweetheart by being present with them.

“If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change,” said Buddha.

A flower is the sexual organ of a plant. Imagine how much your relationship would change if you could see the miracle of your partner clearly. To do that, quiet your mind and your ego, open your eyes and your heart…and drink your sweetheart in. And then feel what you can feel. A miracle.

You won’t just reconnect with your partner; you’ll reconnect with your essence, the essence of life, love, God.

Start again with a fresh slate. Dump the hostility about what didn’t happen and the false notions about what should happen. Give each other and your love the benefit of the doubt. And just be still, be present.

Be refreshed. And refresh your relationship.