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I was born to LIVE. And I’m finally ready to do it with my eyes wide open.

And then there was oneness …

Dear Friends … Something motivates you, What?

Is it okay that you don’t clean your house until company’s on the way? That you don’t lose ten pounds until you want to wear that bikini? That you don’t grab the next rung on the ladder until …? When we do the “right” thing, we realize the intangible satisfaction of being true to our self. The right thing is motivated by love, rather than fear. It’s not determined by the consequences or somebody else’s approval.

BUT when there is somebody or something that motivates us to be our best self, let’s seize the opportunity. Let’s be good stewards and milk the motivation. As we revel in the results, we’ll compound our motivation. And somewhere along the way, we’ll realize that we truly want to do the right thing even when nobody is watching. And, here’s the part I love, somebody who matters will be there to share in it with us. Somebody who gets us, somebody who knows all of who we are, somebody who’ll help us make sure we don’t settle for less than our best.

Love smiles on you,… More

All fear is birthed by the same lie!

From the time we learn the word “no,” we begin to get the message that what we would do naturally is “bad.” As young children, we can’t make a distinction between our behavior and ourselves, so we buy into a lie — the lie that in order to be good enough we have to sit still and be quiet, or look pretty, or SOMETHING. But you know as well as I do that some of the demands we place on children (and ourselves) are more apt to stifle them than make them good.

“Even if you were fortunate enough to grow up in a safe, nurturing environment, you still bear invisible scars from childhood, because from the very moment you were born you were a complex, dependent creature with a never-ending cycle of needs. Freud correctly labeled us ‘insatiable beings.’ And no parents, no matter how devoted, are able to respond perfectly to all of these changing needs,” says Harville Hendrix in his bestselling “Getting the Love You Want.”

We have a fundamental motivation to be accepted, which is why you might jump to defend yourself, your parents, your children (even while reading this). Rejection used to point to a problem that needed our attention, and our survival depended on how sensitive and responsive we were.… More

You are innately good …

When Harville Hendrix offered this endorsement of my last book, I thought, “It is enough.”:

“Innately Good is one of the most moving books I have ever read. Its message is also one of the most important messages for us all. Stating her thesis that ‘you are love,’ and documenting it in multiple sources, author Jan Denise locates the anti-thesis, that we are not ‘good enough,’ in our evolutionary, religious, and psychological history. Vulnerably using her personal history as the narrative thread, and weaving in the experiences of her clients, Denise eloquently describes the appalling negative impact of trying to be ‘good enough’ on our personal and relational lives and its debilitating impact on society. But she does not leave us with a scholarly analysis only. She closes the book with concrete processes of discovering our innate goodness and experiencing ourselves as ‘love.'” ~ Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., author of best-selling “Getting the Love You Want”

You can find my books at your favorite place to buy books or Amazon.com. … More

Are you too busy?

Occasionally the truth flashes in front of us; and we catch a glimpse of what contradicts the theory that we’re being honest, or that we have it all together, or that it’s somebody else’s fault that we don’t. We’re busy, though; we don’t have time to sit with the truth. And acting on it is just too much this week … this month … this year. Let’s not be too busy for the truth today.… More