We instinctively want to shield children from trauma, which makes divorce a tough choice … but if your partnership is unhealthy, it also makes staying married a tough choice. You might find yourself trying to pick the lesser of two evils.

My husband and I lean in opposite directions — he toward the trauma of staying together; I toward the trauma of divorce. His parents divorced when he was very young; mine stayed together through thick and thin!

Your situation, of course, is unique, but you’re not alone. Fifty percent of first marriages and 67 percent of second marriages end in divorce. I believe some failing marriages can be saved … and I love to help revive them. Others, sadly, were unwisely entered into to begin with; and holding them together serves no one.

The ideal solution is for us to learn more about ourselves and relationships before committing for life! In the meantime, we have to make the best of what is.

If both partners want to save their marriage, it’s never too late for counseling. And if only one partner has the desire and the other one is willing to participate, there’s still hope.

One of the biggest challenges can be to reverse a decision that’s already been made to divorce.… More

We can’t embrace what we long for until we stop clinging to what gives us a false sense of security. But often we cling unconsciously to what we used to cope.

We’re still holding on to a security blanket that we needed as a child. It no longer serves us. And we can let go, but only after we have identified it consciously.… More

Until we have learned to love ourselves unconditionally, we may imagine God to love us only if we meet certain conditions. We may fashion Him after our fears, as a father who gets angry when we stumble, and as one who would punish us from that anger.

But God is not fashioned after our fears. Rather, we are fashioned after His spirit.

God made us lovable. And He gave us the privilege of freewill. We continually choose to be true to fear or to spirit. … More