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What’s healthy?

It’s true that we can get so consumed by a relationship that we don’t seem to have time for anything else. And we can get so caught up in pleasing a partner that we lose sight of our own needs and desires. We forget who we are. BUT in a healthy relationship, both individuals have a safe place to probe deeper into who they are, to know and share more substance. They have a safe place to be vulnerable, to face their fears, to overcome their fears, and grow into a purer, fuller version of their authentic self. And in doing so, they purify their love for each other; and they keep their interaction alive and dynamic.… More

True to Love …

When I am true to myself, I am true to Love. And I can trust the consequences of my choices to reflect Love’s perfection. I can trust the pieces of my life to come together and serve my highest good. If I yield to fear, I deviate from Love. I get a different result. I get a lesson that redirects me to Love. Love is still there. And I can choose again. … More

If you would be true to somebody else, anybody, be true to YOU …

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Dear Friends … Courage enough to divorce

Dear Friends,

I have written about my struggle to find the truth and act on it. Some of you have sensed change and expressed your caring. Thank you.

After exhausting my efforts to create (or re-create) a healthy relationship, I finally divorced a few months ago. Grace provided me with the certainty I needed to move forward in peace. I am grateful to have lost so much of my ego in the last 18 years. I am also grateful for the experience and wisdom I gained. I am grateful for another chance, and the courage to take it. I am grateful that it’s not my responsibility to choose for anybody else, or to make anybody else understand. And I am grateful that when we align with love, we can trust the consequences to serve our highest good.

I have found deeper happiness than I have ever known. Love is always founded and guided by truth. Love immerses us in peace and joy. And love frees us to be our best self. That’s the love I write about, the love I believe in, the love I live. And I will forever be learning to align with that love more closely.

Love smiles on you,… More

Keep the babies coming …

At a bridal shower, two of the guests brought their babies — not the screaming ones, the sweet and adorable ones. As host, I watched as 20 women with different backgrounds and personalities also became sweet and adorable!

Babies, particularly our own, bring out our heroics. I have seen moms and dads do what they didn’t know they could do. The gruff learn to talk “baby.” The anal learn to handle mess. I thought for sure one of my tablecloths would be done in by strawberries and chocolate, but it didn’t matter.

Babies reach beyond our superficial exteriors (driven by our egos and insecurities) to what’s inside. And what’s inside all of us is the same.

I observed 20 women demonstrate an unconditional acceptance of the babies that they may not have been ready to demonstrate toward the other women at the shower! The conclusion: Babies are good therapy!

This is not news. You have likely watched as a baby melted everybody’s heart at a doctor’s office or a family reunion. And surely God knowingly planned for babies to remain a part of our lives.

The take-away: Apply the same caring and tolerance that we have for babies to everybody else!… More

Once we realize that it doesn’t matter how we compare with others, we are free to be our best self.