“The best women will always be attracted to the men with the strongest convictions,” writes one reader.

Maybe he’s on to something, assuming that the men with the strongest convictions also live by them. We’re all looking for our way, so when somebody seems to have found theirs, that somebody (male or female) can be very attractive.

I’m not talking about arrogant or narrow-minded. Those qualities don’t attract the “best” women — or men. When somebody really knows the truth, he has a quiet self-assurance, and he’s not close-minded or threatened by a difference in philosophy.

I am talking about somebody who knows what he believes independent of society or religion or political party or club, somebody who has heard his own music and isn’t afraid to dance to it.

Imagine the earth as one giant dance floor. You can look around and see people who go through the motions as though they can’t quite feel the music. You see others trying to find some good moves to mimic. And, you see others who close their eyes and move effortlessly to the beat.

People with strong convictions hear their own music … and they’re not afraid to get out there and dance.… More

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We’re bound to wonder why somebody else — you know, the loose cannon down the street — can’t seem to commit (or break away, as the case may be) once and for all. But we don’t have to look that far to find an emotional roller coaster. Chances are there’s somebody under your own roof you adore one minute and want to blast to the moon the next.

We lack the blasting power to overpopulate the moon, but domestic violence is a serious social problem in America, with conservative estimates citing about a million incidents a year. And, yes, sometimes all is forgiven before charges are ever filed.

Our emotions can be irrational and still override our intellects.

“Emotion is stronger than thought, preceding it both in evolution and in the wiring of our brain, so an emotion — frustration, rage, sadness, sexual desire, fatigue — can take on a reality independent of external circumstance,” says Henry S. Lodge, M.D., in “Younger Next Year for Women” (also true for men, but I read the women’s version of the book).

It’s no wonder we find ourselves reacting disproportionately when we get caught up in our emotions. While intellectually we know what makes sense — and manage to act on that at least occasionally — our emotions often kick in, particularly in affairs of the heart.… More