Uncategorized – Page 734

Wholeheartedly … or not at all

When in doubt: If you can’t do it wholeheartedly, you can’t do it in love. Don’t talk yourself into it to save yourself or somebody else!

Love is not motivated by fear!… More

Bare all to enchant, in any season

Summer demands that we bare all those body parts we’ve conveniently layered in sweaters. And if you’re feeling squeamish about that, you’re trying to protect more than just your abs and your thighs from rejection.

When you accept the rest of you, you also accept your physical body. You embrace who you are inside and out, regardless of other people’s opinions. Stay with me, though, I’m not just talking about the unconditional acceptance that gets so much hype.

Let’s think in terms of loving yourself. What does that really look like? Accepting yourself unconditionally is only one segment of it. You want to know, respect, and care for all of you.

You can’t, for example, merely accept your complacency or “white” lies or defensiveness and expect to also feel good about yourself. Self-esteem comes from being true to you, or aligning your behavior with your values, from doing what you know to do to the best of your ability.

And when you’ve done that, you’ve spent enough time in solitude to know what you really believe and what you can do with your whole heart. You’ve come to understand the pain behind your anger, the insecurity behind your defensiveness, and the fear that keeps you from doing what you most want to do.… More

Want forever oneness with a partner?

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Always enough …

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When we want to run, it’s time to grow …

Before Sam and I got married, God was gracious enough to give me signs that we were intended to be together. I say gracious because I didn’t ask for signs; I didn’t know I needed them! But later, I would be MOST grateful for the signs…and during some pivotal moments, they would be vital to our marriage.

As a single person, I thought I had relationships figured out. I had, after all, written a nationally syndicated column for several years, as well as a book, on relationships! So as a married person, I was tempted to make Sam more responsible than I was for those moments when I wanted to run.

But relationships are always two-sided. I knew that too well to fool myself! We get stuck (maybe in serial running) when we try to assign blame! We get unstuck when we assume responsibility and grow.

Today I am happier than I could have imagined being. And I couldn’t feel this way without those pivotal moments early on, because those are the moments that spurred the most growth. When I felt the most challenged, I had the most to learn. When I felt the most pain, I was–my issues were–the most exposed.… More

Is your relationship divine?

You are not defined by what’s in the mirror, or the bank, or somebody else’s judgment. You are defined by what’s within. And if you look closely, you’ll find a divine spark.

It’s enough of whatever you could possibly need or want!

It’s the divinity of love. … More