We continually choose what “makes” us happy or unhappy. But if we do it out of habit — or by default — we may scarcely realize that we can and do choose.
Each of our choices yields a consequence. And we learn from consequences. Unfortunately, part of what we learn perpetuates the negative — and keeps us from doing something about it.
If, for example, somebody breaks off a relationship with you, you might attribute it to your inadequacy and reinforce your habitual thinking that you’re not good enough. Discouraged, you fumble the proverbial ball, which perpetuates your negative opinion of yourself.
Your thoughts trigger feelings; your feelings inspire actions; and your actions get results that “make” you squeal with delight or scream or simply plod on. This cycle repeats itself — over and over again. And you just might find yourself in a rut or living a life based on bad habits.
“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit,” said Aristotle.
You can develop new habits — or excellence. Begin by thinking new thoughts. That’s painless. In fact, it just might come as a relief, if you let it. Don’t take on any pressure to make changes or act on the thoughts.… More