Love has no agenda …

AUTHENTIC LOVE is my concept of love. It extends far beyond romantic love or even consummate love shared with a life partner. Love is everything good; it is the force for good. It is pure and resolute, with no self-serving agenda, with no degrees or deviation. It is passion and peace. It is responsibility and freedom, strength and tenderness, rock solid and transparent. It is defenseless and invulnerable! It is neither pride nor shame. It is fearless, unifying, compassionate, and healing. It is mine, yours, nobody’s, and everybody’s. It can’t be seen, or touched, or quantified; but it is everywhere. It is everything. It is the only thing that matters.

an excerpt from the preface of my upcoming book
photo by Sam… More

LOVE YOURSELF TO A HEALTHY WEIGHT

Is weight standing between you and the relationship of your dreams? Reaching a healthy weight is part of loving yourself well.

TIP TWO: Save some of your calories for dessert or a snack by foregoing the starch (potato, rice, pasta, or bread) with your meal.

Salad for dinner is a delicious alternative, especially during warm weather. And dressing doesn’t have to have more calories than the salad! A tasty vinegar with salt and pepper can be yummy–try aged balsamic, rice, or sweet mango–and if you want more substance, just substitute yogurt for mayo or oil. Cheese and nuts may be enough protein; but if you want more, top with blackened fish, ham, crab, or chicken. We have a few go-to favorites; but you never have to eat the same salad twice.

PRACTICE: Skip the starch, use nutritious greens for bulk, and add taste treats, like sun-dried tomatoes, roasted beets, peppadews, cheese (a little goes a long way), nuts, fresh fruit, crispy onions, and jalapeño jelly.… More

One of the things, if we’re honest, standing between you and the relationship of your dreams is weight. And reaching a healthy weight is part of learning to love yourself well.

So, I’m launching ten tips.

Love Yourself to a Healthy Weight

One of Ten Tips:

Eat what makes you close your eyes to savor it!
This makes one bite worth three!

Here, I demonstrate with a white chocolate truffle. This is serious fun and serious love. Food is intended to nourish your body AND your spirit. So, be present and indulge yourself. You can swallow that bite whole, OR you can savor it.

PRACTICE: DON’T BE IN SUCH A BIG HURRY TO GET TO THE NEXT BITE! … More

FIVE AREAS OF INTIMACY to help you determine if you’re compatible, or have the BASIS for a satisfying relationship, adapted from the work of Michael Murphy, a psychologist at the University of Florida:

B-ehavioral
A-ffective
S-piritual
I-ntellectual
S-exual

Behavioral:
Do you like to do the same things? Do you have similar levels of motivation/energy?

Affective:
How much of yourself and your emotions can you put out there, and still feel safe and accepted?

Spiritual:
Do you have similar values and share a common sense of purpose?

Intellectual:
Can you have intellectually stimulating conversation, about more than one subject?

Sexual:
How connected do you feel sexually–even when you’re not having sex?

Even at a glance, these five areas of intimacy help you see why past romances flourished or fell flat and, probably, they point to some naivety or foolishness. You’re not stupid, though; you’re delightfully human. And oddly enough, humans don’t get much relationship training. AND, this assessment can’t be fully launched until everyday life kicks in! That could be all the reason you need to hold off on commitment. You can’t discover what your relationship really looks like while life revolves around goo-goo eyes and kissing! But it’s never too late to assess what you actually have; and that assessment, like getting to know each other, is an ongoing practice.… More

Heaven on earth is no pipe dream; it’s ensured by The Lord’s Prayer. But there is no ego in heaven, so we’re shedding it! And sometimes we resist something fierce.

Relationships paint a poignant picture of this with two butting egos! Give up the ego, and you’ve got a fairytale … it may or may not last forever, but it will always have a happy ending!… More

With each human interaction, we choose to come from love or fear. Love connects and builds relationship. Fear disconnects and builds walls. That doesn’t mean that love always keeps two people together romantically. But love always gives them the courage to communicate honestly and develop intimacy that’s real–even if it means letting go of sex. It’s not the love–or even the breakup–that hurts us. It’s the fear and lack of connection that hurt us–sometimes because we run from intimacy, and sometimes because we cling to a “relationship” that’s empty! … More