Love has no agenda …

Don’t worry about how he sees you sexually or how you see him sexually.

Focus on how you see yourself sexually. Choose how you want to feel, how you want to appear, how you want to express yourself, your sexuality, and your love.

Then, revisit how he sees you and how you see him.

I think you’ll find there’s nothing left to worry about.

PS: This photo may represent an image you want or don’t want. There is no wrong if it’s true to you.… More

Loving ourselves allows us to truly love others.

When we know who we are, we know who others are. We all share the same essence. When we face our own brokenness, we can see brokenness in others, without defining them by it. There is neither pride nor shame. There is neither superiority nor inferiority.

Our essence is love. Our brokenness is a part of coming to know that.… More

Sam and I had a very long talk Sunday morning. We SO needed to talk, which means It would have been SO much easier not to.

A healthy relationship is work. And it can feel like more work when you go through a big move, one of you gets sick, and one of you is out of town for ten days. We don’t do our best work when we’re sick and tired!

Relationships are a priority, though. And our primary relationship with a partner is a BIG priority–either that, or it’s unhealthy.

Healthy is an ongoing choice. … More

Dear Friends,

When we struggle to squeeze in what we really want to do, it’s not because we lack time. It’s because we’ve filled our time with other things. And however good they might be, they are less worthy of our time.

Instead of struggling (that’s not a lot of fun), we can simply give priority to what we want. We can allocate time for what’s important to us—before we start filling it up with what comes along.

When we accomplish what’s most critical, we’re energized … and we can keep the momentum going. When we get distracted, we’re apt to feel like we can’t quite manage it all; we’re apt to struggle—instead of staying present and in the flow.

We can find joy in doing what we want to do. Why not? It is what we want to do. When we make it feel like work instead, it’s because we get off center. We get distracted. Maybe because we feel guilty, or worry about what somebody else wants or what somebody else will think. Maybe because we’re afraid we can’t pull it off, or we’ll have to live up to it if we do. The guilt, the worry, the fear are rooted in ego—not our true self.… More

Dear Friends,

The following quote from Calvin Coolidge, the 30th president of the United States, has always been one of my favorites:

“Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan ‘Press On’ has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.”

I have found comfort over the years in knowing that I didn’t have to be the most talented or the most educated person to get the job done. It is progressively clear to me, though, that persistence develops talent and spurs learning. It uncovers the genius in each of us.

Persistence is more than determination and resolve. It is work. It is the effort that must be rewarded. It is the practice that makes perfect.

Persistence is not merely hanging in there long enough. It is learning what creates the desired result — often after learning what does not. It is honing your skill and refining your love. It is believing that you can make a difference.… More