Love has no agenda …

Happy Fourth of July! I hope you feel the exhilaration of freedom — and the responsibility that accompanies it. You are free and empowered to be the person you want to be.

“I just have to tell you — you look sensational,” said a woman in the grocery store. I thanked her … and the conversation began. This woman had recently lost 57 pounds and beamed liberation. She said she saw me and said to herself, “That can be me.”

She had rid herself of the extra pounds, which she allowed to box her in, and she was free to shine. She felt no more limitations. She was not the least bit threatened by a “sensational” looking woman a good 10 years her junior. Instead, she thought, “That can be me.” And maybe by the time she walked away, she was thinking, “That — only better — can be me!”

You can be you better than you can be anybody else. And there is an unshakable peace in being you, an unsurpassed joy in being the best you can be.

That’s why Sam and I find so much delight in being together. There is nothing held back — no barriers, no pretense.… More

He’s just not that interested in sex anymore … and desire has always been a big turn-on for me.

She said the words, without realizing their significance, during a weekend retreat designed to help her and her husband restore intimacy. Women want to be sexually desired. It’s in their genes. And for the most part, they work at it.

So, when men don’t demonstrate their longing, women can be sorely disappointed.

What many women don’t seem to understand is that men are also turned on by their partner’s yearning … and this can be particularly true in a committed relationship, in which the man is foregoing the variety he’s biologically driven to seek out.

So, what happens when both partners develop a take-it-or-leave-it attitude about sex? Right — they don’t have it very often. And their desire continues to wane.

If your partner no longer seems sexually attracted to you, your ego alone offers you reason enough to be nonchalant. Smile. And, yes, your nonchalance (like his) can be a big turn off. And the hard-to-get strategy can be downright ineffective played amidst the daily grind, breeding more resentment than desire.

If you want your partner to demonstrate heated desire, demonstrate your own.… More

If you didn’t really stop to think about those words — for richer, for poorer — before you said them, they might be ringing in your ears.

You don’t have to lose your fortune, or your life’s savings, to realize how quickly it could happen. It doesn’t matter who you are or how hard or long you worked for it, it’s up for grabs. Well, almost.

Economic crisis, like any other crisis, shows us — and everybody around us — what we’re made of. And, no, you don’t have to lose your own butt to show it.

The truth is, sometimes we befriend, or even marry, somebody for their money … and when they lose it, our motivation can be painfully obvious, even to the oblivious. Yes, you can marry somebody for their money without their knowing it, or admitting it to themselves.

“Everybody in the family was talking about it, we knew she wanted more than his good looks and kind disposition, but nobody had the heart to burst his bubble,” writes one reader. “And now, face the truth, he must.”

We want to believe the best about ourselves and others, even when we don’t really believe it. So, two people can get married without either of them fully acknowledging — even to themselves — the ulterior motive!… More

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We cannot create our greatness. We can only allow it.

Realizing that truth is an epic challenge.

Acting on it is THE challenge.… More

Even after we realize that we have created a false front to protect ourselves from rejection and win approval, we often find ourselves reinforcing the front, rather than dismantling it.

We must remember that our authenticity is our greatness, our gift, our magic. We cannot improve on it. We can cover it up and lose sight of it, but we can never lose it.

It’s in there!… More