Love has no agenda …

Dear Friends,

I may make living a life of love seem easier than it is. A life of love, after all, is the “fairytale” we yearn for. And if it were easy, everybody would be doing it, right?

The only thing that stands in our way is fear, because fear is the only thing that CAN displace love (there is no fear in love). But letting go of fear is the work of a lifetime.

Still, in those moments when we have no fear, life is as glorious–and as easy–as it gets.

Here’s to growing our moments!

Love and hugs,

Jan … More

He said he’d call by noon. It’s 1:00 … and you’re still waiting to get dressed. You want to scream, but he wouldn’t be able to hear you. Besides, you don’t really want him to know you’ve been counting the last 60 minutes.

Instead of screaming — or counting the minutes — when you’re frustrated with a date, take a deep breath, and let him (or her) teach you something.

The teachers who challenged you the most taught you the most, right? The bosses who demanded more than you knew you had provoked growth, right? How else would you have landed the position you have now?

And, yes, the dates (and people in general) who challenge your sanity the most are your best teachers. They are going to help you pull off the relationship of your dreams!

If you’re protesting that she’s an airhead or he’s a jerk, read on. They don’t have to be well learned, refined or even willing to teach you what you need to know. All they have to do is push your hot buttons or trigger your insecurities.

It’s your stuff that stands between you and the relationship you want.

I’m not asking you to settle for the guy who can’t show up on time; I’m asking you to look at why his tardiness unnerves you.… More

You can start your day with what seems like an unlimited supply of attention — the thing your sweetheart, boss and the media are all vying for — and still end your day with zip on automatic pilot in front of the TV.

Sadly, that means not giving the most important people in your life the attention they want, and probably not getting the attention you want from them.

In today’s economy, it’s easy to give work all of your attention and still feel like it’s not enough. You might be doing the work of two people or just trying to hold on to your job, but exhausting your resources is not the answer.

So, what is the answer? In his book, “Beyond Success: Redefining the Meaning of Prosperity,” Jeffrey Gitterman presents attention as a currency that we can consciously spend and replenish.

Gitterman paints a familiar picture from his own life of what happens when we don’t do that. “You walk through the door to your wife and four kids, one being a newborn. Your wife has left her energy and attention on the playroom floor, drained by the constant demands of children. She is craving and expecting attention from you, just as you are craving and expecting it from her.… More

The ideal partner can offer a safe place for you to reveal and heal your wounds; but he (or she) can’t do it for you. And even if he could, he wouldn’t! He trusts you too much to think he needs to; and he loves you too much not to let you fly. … More

Stop waiting for a knight in shining armor to rescue you. Ride off to meet him! By the time you find him, you won’t need him, but you’ll be ready for him. … More

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