You’re starring in your own love story …
And you get to write your own lines and deliver them yourself. What are you saying? How does the story play out?
Don’t despair. You also get to re-write the story. … More
You’re starring in your own love story …
And you get to write your own lines and deliver them yourself. What are you saying? How does the story play out?
Don’t despair. You also get to re-write the story. … More
Most of us get it in our heads that we have to do something magnificent to prove our worth. But when we realize that we are worthy, we can lose the fear that we’re not and simply be who we are.
Manifesting true magnificence is a byproduct of being true to ourself. Let go of everything but you, everything but love. … More
I have a new exuberance about what comes next, because I know I can rise to the occasion. There was a time when I had mixed feelings–the dissonance between “I want to grow” and “maybe I can’t really do this.”
Sometimes we want to shoot for the moon, but we’re still afraid to fly. We have to learn that we CAN fly. We have to find our wings.
Doing whatever we want to do, whatever we were born to do, requires faith in the learning process. I know I might fall down AND I know if I do, it’s okay. I can get up and try again.
And I will. So, will you. We’ve got this! And we have every reason to revel in the process.… More
From a reader: “Recently, I have become reacquainted with an old high school friend. He told me that he and his wife have not had sex for about 10 years — they have been married for 45 — and he has decided to go outside his marriage and have an affair.
I say, ‘No, no, no, that is not the right answer.’ But I do understand his position. She has made it clear she is not interested in sex with him. He is 64 years old, and would like to have a warm, loving relationship with a woman.
His thoughts and ideas have given me pause, since I have also told my husband that I am not interested in having sex with him.
The two situations are different. My friend signed up for love and sex in his marriage contract. My husband, on the other hand, knew when we got married a year ago (both at a youthful 65) that he was signing on for a marriage without sex. I also signed on for a marriage without sex and now realize that that may not have been such a good idea. My husband may be feeling the same way.
I know you are going to say I should open a dialogue with my husband, but it’s very difficult to do.… More
You’re gritting your teeth and talking under your breath again, wondering if he deliberately provokes you … and if he waits until people are watching to do it.
It’s no coincidence that he’s more irritating when you’re the center of attention. That is, after all, when you’re more consumed with presentation — and what everybody else is thinking! Therein lies the problem.
When it seems as though he’s annoying you, he’s actually just triggering your feelings of insecurity. Without those, there would be no reason to grit your teeth. The mother of all your negative, self-defeating emotion is the belief that you’re not good enough. If you knew beyond all doubt that there was nothing wrong with you, you could drop the pretense and share the real you, without any anxiousness, defensiveness, blame, or qualifiers! And he, too, could be himself, without your making excuses for his behavior, or wondering who noticed!
If that sounds implausible, it’s because you’re playing prisoner to perception.
But what’s real is more sacred and more beautiful than what you’ve conjured up to fit in or win approval. If you don’t believe me, imagine the sleeping face of your first child, or your sweetheart, or the beloved friend who died last year.… More
The partner of your dreams is the one who loves the naked you. But in order for him to do that, you have to share the naked you. And you’ll be more comfortable doing that if you get to know and love who you are naked. … More
Jan's program for the quest of a lifetime.
DISCOVER:
~ What love really is
~ Who you are, apart from the facade
~ What it actually looks like to love you
~ How it feels to exercise the freedom to be youClick to Read More
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You can consult with Jan in person in Ocala, FL, or by phone (audio, Skype, or FaceTime). Call/text (386) 299-6256 or e-mail for more information or to schedule a consultation. Details for Paid Consultation