Love has no agenda …

From a reader: “I hate to give up on our relationship, but to stay feels like giving up on my dreams.”

To walk away from what we hoped — and promised — would last forever is one of the most heart-wrenching breaks we can make. It feels as though we’re cutting off a piece of ourselves … and we struggle desperately to decide if it’s right and if it’s necessary.

How do we know?

Ask yourself: What would I do if I weren’t afraid? Will I be better off next week, next month and next year if I stay?

Don’t kid yourself. You don’t really want to feed your fear. And if staying doesn’t serve you, it doesn’t serve your partner either. It’s arrogant to think that a partner needs your pity. He needs love; he doesn’t have to get it from you.

Don’t give up on yourself and don’t give up on your partner, either. If you’re both better off without each other, then give up on the relationship and save yourselves.

Your dreams are a reflection of who you are, or at least they should be. If they’re obsolete, change them. Base them on what you want — not on what somebody else wants for you or what society expects.… More

As we prepare to move, I am especially grateful that we can feel secure in the arms of love, without knowing what comes next. The path may be uncertain, but the purpose is sure.

Our destiny is to choose love, to manifest love, and to grow into the very best version of who we are, what we are. LOVE.… More

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One of the toughest and most rewarding lessons we can learn in relationships: What’s missing is what I’m not giving.

When you are open to that truth, you will see it. And it will dramatically change your relationship and your life.

I know this, because I have been curled up on my bed sobbing, trying to see how this was possible … to find that it was both possible and precisely true!

And it’s very good news. WE CAN GIVE WHAT’S MISSING AND GET WHAT WE WANT.… More

When we’re open to resolution, to a win-win, it’s not difficult to find one.

It’s when we want to make somebody else lose that we have a fight—and blood—on our hands. It’s when we are afraid to lose (the argument or whatever it is we’re clutching) that we can’t dismiss the anger. We WANT something to be angry about, somebody to blame for something.

When we choose love, it displaces anger and fear. … More

Commitment is an ongoing decision—whether it’s made consciously or unconsciously.

And being honest about what you’re feeling today is even more important to a healthy relationship than keeping a commitment you made yesterday. … More