Love has no agenda …

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The heart-wrenching pain of a breakup can be too severe to deny. But we don’t have to get pushed out the door to feel the pain of rejection.

Eons ago our survival depended on being sensitive to rejection; because without the protection of the tribe, we were dead meat. But the sensitivity that used to save us can make us miserable!

If you don’t believe me, just think about the last time you asked him if you looked fat. Chances are, he didn’t have to say anything; just looking like he didn’t know what to say was enough. Or what about the last time she mentioned a car or a vacation you couldn’t afford, maybe one her ex could have easily paid for?

We are biologically programmed to sense rejection as a sign that something is wrong with us…and because we grow up with words like “no,” “bad” and “evil,” unconscious feelings of inferiority are universal. We can get depressed or cranky without even realizing it’s because we got our feelings hurt.

It doesn’t really matter if you’re seven pounds overweight — besides you knew you were before you asked. And who cares what you drive or where you vacation — what you really want is to be happy.… More

It’s when we want to make somebody else wrong that we have a fight on our hands. It’s when we are afraid to lose (the argument or whatever we struggle to hold on to) that we can’t dismiss the anger. We WANT something to be angry about, somebody to blame for something.

When we choose love, it displaces anger and fear. … More