Love has no agenda …

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We all have favorite fireworks — the ones that change color or explode again and again, or cascade like they’re never going to stop. But it’s the finale that peaks our exuberance and leaves us with hushed satisfaction.

A finale by definition requires that we lead up to it…so our expectation of a grand “finale” while jumping into sex sets the stage for failure.

New books on how to have great sex keep streaming in. You want to know.

When we make our own fireworks, we can start out with a bang, but between the bang and the finale, we have to vary the intensity. We have to leave ourselves someplace to go. If we deplete our triple spins and flying missiles in the first few minutes, there may be no finale. It’s a simple lesson.

Try thinking of sex as a chance to tell your partner how much you love him. In order for your expression to be sincere and well received, you have to feel love. Get to that point before you start trying to light the fireworks.

And in the words of our dance instructor (yes, Sam and I took dance lessons), “take her with you.” Make sure you’re together — this is critical on and off the dance floor.… More

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We say we want to be happy as though something has to happen to MAKE us happy. But happy is a choice WE make, and we can make it in any situation.

If we really want to be happy, we are!… More

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