Jan Denise – Page 234

Let’s grow what we have with gratitude …

Free to fly …

When we really want a relationship–or anything else–we have to risk falling down. Most of us have attached some stigma to the fall, especially when somebody is watching. But we can’t learn to walk, or dance, or fly without “falling down.” We can’t learn to get up without falling down. And we need to know how to get up! Because no matter how hard we try to avoid it, we will take a fall. We can learn to do it well, with grace and honesty.

When we let go of the notion that we should be able to pull off the happily-ever-after without some rough landings, we’re free to be who we are! Somebody else can tune into us! And that IS the fairytale … two people who truly know each other, who aren’t denying the pitfalls, but rather learning to navigate through them! Two people who face each other and life with open eyes, whether they just landed in the dirt or they’re soaring through blue skies.

If you want happily-ever-after skies, learn to hit the dirt and brush it off, without letting it define you. Learn to get up! Way up!… More

Let’s look up and remember …

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True Happy …

Freedom to be happy is freedom to be true-to-you. And that is as good as you get … as a parent, a partner, a friend.… More

Immersed in Grace …

With a dip in the pool, following my jog, I feel very grateful. And I want to share something. If it’s more than you want to hear, I hope you’ll love me anyway–not just for my sake, for yours, too. Five weeks ago, I had surgery to remove my breast implants. The decision to put them in was made 27 years ago. And while I wasn’t bemoaning it, I knew it wasn’t a choice I’d make again. I was living with dissonance. But surgery involved risk, expense, and recovery, making it a tough choice.

I’m learning to take the first step, though, trusting love to bring the pieces together. And I’m so grateful. I had no idea I’d feel THIS liberated. I couldn’t undo what I’d done, but I’m grateful, so grateful, for my best shot at it. No implants, no fat grafting. The surgeon said I didn’t have enough fat for him to charge me to move it. He was funny and so kind.

No judgment here. This was just the right choice for ME. I find my joy in being me. I find my beauty in feeling like me. I find my peace in discerning dissonance–any deviation from my true self–and aligning with love.… More

Is sex as close as you get to somebody “getting” you?

We are smitten by somebody who lets us in and “gets” us, somebody who is tuned in to us. The biological need we have to be loved is really a need to be seen and understood, to be valued, to be responded to. To be in synch! And while this desire seems almost lost to our consciousness, it helps to explain why sex is our favorite substitute for love. If only for a few moments, we have dropped our boundaries and connected.

Let’s recognize sex for what it is—a beautiful glimpse of love. But let’s not stop at a glimpse. … More